28th Feb 2008 - Earthquake

Currently, a familiar tune is echoing in my mind & resounding throughout my room. This melancholic tune brings back many memories, of all sorts of shape and sizes. I wonder what people would do with their memories? Cherish them, hold on to them as a beacon of hope, no matter how faint or dim it is? Or chuck them aside, locking them in a mental cage for all eternity? Perhaps some would place them into a treasure chest, occasionally taking them out and reminisce the past, while a smile forms subconsciously. I think for most, we never bother to think about what memories really are to us…

Sometimes, I feel so inept, in terms of character, especially after attending church. Since I left Singapore, I felt it has been so much of a challenge trying to be a nice person to everyone. To be able to concoct the right mixture of being firm and reasonable, yet being understanding and tolerant, is by no means a simple task. A few days ago, a friend said something along the lines of this “only by our sins would we be able to see the grace of God”. I suppose our inadequateness has a role to play in developing and redefining our lifestyles as we journey through life.

As I was trying to sleep last night, I experienced the tremors from an earthquake. It is rare to encounter earthquakes in UK. I was reading the papers this morning and the frequency of an earthquake is approximately once in every 10-25 years. If I am not mistaken, the only injury sustained, from this earthquake, was by a man who hurt his leg due to a collapsed chimney. Apparently, when I first felt the tremors, I thought someone was probably making loads of noise in his room. However, I thought to myself then that no one could make so much noise till my bed would be shaking as well. Furthermore, my ceiling was also trembling. I couldn’t imagine that it would be either of my 2 resident tutors, living above me, to be having a party that would bring the house down. That was when I realized that it was probably an earthquake. In my mind, when I conceptualized the probability of an earthquake, I was thinking of whether should I get dressed and take my valuables with me including my passport. I thought that it would be extremely troublesome to replace a passport, especially when I have a VISA in it. It seems like safety isn’t of paramount importance to me. Well, guess what I did eventually? I just carried on with my numerous futile attempts to stumble into slumber land!

It’s another 2 weeks plus till my vacation in Italy. Meanwhile, I’m feeling quite stressed by my work and project. I really hope I will be able to fully utilize this time to do a productive revision in preparation for my upcoming exams. I strongly feel the need to discipline myself into doing so… as time ticks away silently and perhaps, cruelly…